Challenges On Roads I’ve Chosen

when i was a kid, i always said september was my month as i’m a september kid.. but now, i just wished the month september was never found in the calendar.. here it goes..

the first eight days was preety okie, just that my friends were planning "stuff".. and as busybody as i am, i dint really like it.. but i know it was all for me.. so days went by.. everyone gave way to me.. what i say, they do.. what i want, i get.. it was kinda fun at first but i’d still prefer them not treating me like a "princess" just because my birthday was around the corner..

then came the nite before the day.. as i sat by my mobile.. thinking bout how i celebrated it last year.. at that time, i had no one.. but someone.. i was so lonely and sad.. but with her around, nothing else matters.. once again, the flashbacks ran thru my mind.. tears were filling the corner of my eyes.. but my mobile beeps and snapped me back to reality.. the first SmS i received was from my ex.. yea, surprisingly he actually still does remember me.. well, i was touched for a moment.. then all of the sudden.. so many messages came in.. from all sorts of people.. urmm.. it’s easier if i put them all under a group called FRIENDS.. =’ ) i got even more happier when i received wishes from people i dint expected.. well, there was two person.. –if you’re reading this, i just wanna say thanks.. u brighten up my day =)–

so the next day, tho it was sorta like "my day".. but frankly, i wasnt as happy as everyone wanted me to be.. went for tuition.. a few people wished.. but the one i was expecting frm.. never said a word to me.. sigh.. well, it’s okie.. so, then after tuition, went for a movie –charlie and the chocolate factory– n uhh.. if u were wondering, it’s not like what u think.. in a big group or smtg.. it was just miserable me and extra-miserable someone..

nite came and i wasnt really exactly throwin out a party..–mood was actually still down– just had some barbeque stuff and some friends came over.. at the mid of the "party".. sam.erics phoned! lmao.. that was one of the best gift ever.. well atleast it shows u’ve never forgotten me XP tho the conversation was short, sigh.. he actually did asked bout SOMETHING that all of a sudden started bringing my whole mood down again.. i just dont get it.. why is it like she’s my twin or smtg? i mean, no i’m not mad or neither do i hate her.. but sometimes it really gets me annoyed.. hmph!

then bla bla blah.. rite, here comes my shitty mood again.. neway.. make things short.. for the past few days.. so many bull craps problems has came crashing down right on me! i.. urgh.. why me?! seriously it’s ONE AFTER ANOTHER.. great.. so great! –those who are involved secara langsung atau tidak langsung, u should know who u are.. unless u really dont– aihh.. dear lord, i’m so lost and absolutely clueless.. my feelings and everything is totally mixed up! even in skool during lessons, i just cant seem to pay attention.. i just dont know what else to do! i did my best, did all i could.. solved one, but came two.. what am i supposed to do?! i’m only HUMAN! so please please preety please.. bless me, and show me what to do.. thank you! so now you might probably know what does the title for this entry means? hmph..

oyea, also not to forget.. to all those who shared for the cake and the huge teddy.. i just wanna say thanks loads! the "surprise" really did surprised me.. =’ ) thanks thanks a million thanks! muuacckkzzz!! love you guys so much! hopefully we’ll remain as friends for eternity.. chao!