for the past month, I’ve learnt a lot from all the arguments and fights I’ve witnessed and some to be the victims in. come to think bout it, it might be useful for the future..
it has been almost seven months hanging out with my current group of friends.. but only till the last few weeks, I’ve finally witnessed their true color.. some say, the dark-side of a person. at first, it was pretty hard for me to tag along since I was having some communication problems.. speaking English for all my life and just all of a sudden learning Chinese wasn’t really my idea but somehow I managed.. today, I can speak Chinese much better compared to how I did when I was a total “banana”. but in certain ways, I thought of it as a bad idea.. cos at this stage when I probably could understand what most my friends are talking bout, at times hurts my feelings deeply.
for a person of who I am, I’ve always been friendly to absolutely anybody, everybody.. no matter whoever it is.. whether a Chinese, Malay, Indian or Whites, or even stupid, smart, ugly, pretty, rich or poor.. as long as there isn’t any other motives behind the word friendship, never once cross my mind I would just abandoned them. But to a hurting fact was that, my friends who I thought was so “great” actually splashed words on me saying how much of a racists she is.. even worst, she insulted me of acting as a friendly down to earth innocent girl! the only thing I could ever thought of is.. “RACISTS?! Hello? What are we?? Malaysians! and for god sake, if you are a racists.. what the heck are you doing down here?? in where?? MALAY-sia??! Gurl.. get back home to
CHINA !” fine.. I admit I was totally pissed over what she said cos besides having Chinese friends, I also have two other races friends who I consider as my close buddies. yup, an Indian where most of you guys probably already know who and a Malay. for a moment, I felt as if I was in their shoes.. as if what she just said was to me.. I fought and defend not only for my buddies, but also for myself. every word that came out during that time was from the bottom of my heart, my tears that rolled down my cheek was real, everything I said was real. besides that, who could’ve expect that she would even bring out such a stewpid statement like, “yeah, you are not a racists, that’s why you have friends from all races and even prefer guys who are mixed races or should I say “ang-mo”??”. ahhh.. I was soooo lost for words for 2 seconds but then I just hit her back by saying, it isn’t bout the color of a person skin.. its all bout the heart. don’t be surprised if one day in 20 years time, you see me in a stall by the road serving drinks with an Indian guy making roti canai who claims to be my husband. and seriously, not joking.
hmph! since am talking bout friends uh? there’s something I need to make clear of.. I know that I’ve said stuff bout others which somehow make you guys think I hate the certain people or something.. but frankly, I don’t hate anyone. maybe yeah, there are some that I don’t really like but there aint any hard feelings. you might think I hate a person so much, but deep inside.. its just cos I STILL care bout them. they might hate me, they might curse me every single time I walk pass them.. but cross my heart, no matter what, every friend I know will be my friend till my time on earth ends.. we’re all humans rite? so it seems to be a normal thing.. hope there wont be anymore misunderstandings!
another thing I’ve learnt was not by experience but by a movie. have you guys watched Re-cycle? that
Hong Kong horror movie?? if you haven’t, I’d say.. you should! well its only my point of view tho.. basically its bout a writer who writes love novels of her stories based on both her experience and her imagination. but then this time, she decided to try something different which was to write bout the cycle of life and death. without realizing with only using her imagination, she had actually created another world where all abandoned things are left there. when she was trapped in that world, she saw dead people of those who committed suicide, things that have been thrown away, graveyards of the deads that have been abandoned and even the things and ghosts she had created using her imaginations in her stories. when the writer had to go thru this stages to escape back to reality, she was accompanied and showed by a little girl. oh yeah, another stage I forgot to mention which I loved the most was a part where she was actually in a big womb and there were many little embryos and abandoned unborn fetus. it was actually all the innocent childs that got aborted by irresponsible mothers. *sniff* and at the end of the story where the writer had finally reached to the “transit” where she will be back to earth, the little girl told her the truth of who she really is.. aahhh.. this part I cried man! she’s actually the daughter of that writer who got an abortion EIGHT YEARS AGO! *sniff sniff* yeah.. very touching.. eh, I don’t think you’ll get the picture of what I said.. so just watch it if you really wanna know the story and the reason why I said I learnt a lesson.. oh yeah, the lesson.. *ahem* be RESPONSIBLE for what you’ve done.. never abort a child even if the guy is a jackass! cos.. BABIES ARE INNOCENTS~~ *blows nose with a tissue*
